"Hey girl do I get fries with that shake?"
"Hey sweetheart"
Or just the standard whistle or honk of a car horn.
I have to wonder why do men do this? Because really now does it ever get them anywhere with a girl? I can't help but think of the line from Amanda Palmer's song "Ampersand"
The ghetto boys are catcalling me
As I pull my keys from my pocket
I wonder if this method of courtship
Has ever been effective
Has any girl in history said
Sure, you seem so nice, let's get it on
Still, I always shock them when I answer
Hi my name's Amanda
Really what do they expect to happen?
What really irritates me is when people say that I should take it as a compliment. Excuse me? Since when did sexual harassment become complimentary behavior? It's degrading. It's objectifying. Being turned into a "thing" is no compliment.
At times I retort when this happens. If I'm quick enough on my feet to come up with something and in a area with other people around. Because much as I hate to say it, sometimes responding IS NOT A SAFE THING TO DO.
But given the chance I at the very least flip them the bird. Or inform them that "Sorry dude, I like ladies" which gets a lot of them to shut up. In a lot of cases though it's best not to respond. Or to respond only with an icy glare.
The fact that catcalling is viewed as socially acceptable is the most disturbing thing. Well maybe not socially acceptable but socially normal at any rate. But it can be a very upsetting thing. As a girl who is a survivor of sexual assault hearing even a vaguely threatening sexual comment is disturbing and scary. And I know this is the case for many women even if they have not been assaulted in the past.
A few interesting articles on the subject.
http://articles.cnn.com/2008-05-14/living/lw.catcalls_1_street-harassment-sweats-women?_s=PM:LIVING
http://www.boston.com/lifestyle/blogs/thenextgreatgeneration/2012/01/hollaback_and_help_fight_stree.html
http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist/2010/03/18/cat-calling-bystander-sexism-and-how-sexual-harassment-hurts-men/
Catcalling pisses me off like no one's business. I believe if you want to compliment someone, you should walk up to them and say "I really like your hair :] " or "I like your outfit - you look awesome!" or even "Wow, you're very pretty!" Is that so hard to do?
ReplyDeleteI know! When someone tells me specifically that they like my hair or something like that it's fine. I mean hey I have pink hair, people comment on it. But there is such a huge difference between complimenting and harassing!. What seriously worries me is that I honestly think that some people do not know the difference.
ReplyDeleteVery well written, so so true!
ReplyDelete